Dad

So I just talked to my father moments ago. Horrible conversation and it was only made worse by the fact that I'm at work. First, I should probably insert a little background about my dealings with my dad on a certain topic: guilt and old people.

Whenever anyone in my family was getting up in age my dad would issue the warning with something like this: "You know, it's not an emergency but you should go see them." Sometimes he would even up the ante by adding "you know they're not going to be around forever."

This ensured that his daughter who came prepackaged with extra guilt would be sure to go into some serious panicking and self-blame.

Today, my dad put a new twist on this conversation. This time he told me that I needed to come visit him... "You know, it's not emergency but you need to come visit me."

Now it doesn't feel like guilt. It feels like panic. My dad is the one blameless person in my life. He's never done anything wrong in my biased mind and I couldn't bare life without him.

I pray that he's simply exaggerating or that he's using a phrase for his situation that only uses the same words but is not for the same intentions.

I pray in the only way I know how... sending it out there and hoping that someone will listen. Please whoever, help my dad. Make him happy and I'll deal with whatever circumstances that falls under.