down with drama
LAP and i seem to converging on our dramas again. except her crisis has defined edges and she knows what's doing the cutting. i'm just overwhelmed by too many instances of random stress.
it's work. my co-worker has depression. he is training a class that he has very little knowledge of. while i don't want to shake his confidence. he's treading in pretty deep water. he doesn't have clue one how off base he is. it's become a migraine to deal with...
i skipped out on both my psychiatrist appointment and my first counseling session yesterday. called in sick. everyone is bothering me to go to the doctor for my ulcer. i don't know why it isn't important to me to go. perhaps i'm trying to line up as many dominoes as possible to ensure that the chain effect will take longer to complete.
i'm on the hunt for a new layout because with my depression flaring up there are times when i do not update strictly because i cannot find a picture. or am too tired to think. or am too lazy to think. or am trying to hurry off the computer so that eli can have me sit next to him on the couch and watch cartoons that don't always interest me.
am always seconds away from saying we need to split for good. having travel lined up for next month through works makes for more of a sticky wicket. the situation is truly pathetic and needs little description to show it as such.
however, i do love his brother. would hang with eli more if it included hanging with lil bro more. will have to think of a better nickname than that. lil bro doesn't fit the scope of this cat's personality. he's wonderful.
almost time for lunch. am going to try and keep head level and stumble my way outside for a smoke or two. love to LAP.
