Week Night Sitter

i like karaoke. in fact, i like karaoke so much that there was a time when i was damn near addicted to it. i found myself heading out to a local saloon every tuesday evening for a couple times at the mic.

i don't even know if i'm good at it or not but it's fun all the same. i don't have any real buddies there anymore but that hadn't stopped me in the recent past. i went anyway and had a good time.

now flash forward months... i haven't been going lately. i've been financially beaten and psychologically fried. it's fun once you start singing but to actually get up to the mic you have to have some balls already powered up.

tonight i don't have balls, powered or unpowered. i don't like the fact that there is a chill advisory out [for those of you who don't know the wonder that is a chill advisory let's just say that it's a dress rehearsal for hell freezing over, okay?] my car isn't running so swell and is lacking current tabs. i'm not completely bankrupt but i can't seem to go to karaoke without spending a few too many greenbacks...

there is always someone there who is nice to me... or at least drunk enough to feign interest. that should do it. thing is, i'm considering that going to a book store and dropping some dough there might be safer, more fun and easier on my wallet.

this leads me to the question: "have i started farting dust?" no, seriously. am i getting old? first off i mention that my outing of choice is karoake. then i go on to mention that karaoke sounds like a bit too much hassle and i'm going to pick up a book instead.

i should bring in a bit of information about how the place that i frequent has some punk rockers and other alternative crowd. it's semi-hip and not exactly the back of some beer & pizza joint next to the golden tee game. the people who sing at my watering hole of choice also sing with local bands or have some notoriety like writing for a zine or some such.

i have an appointment with a psychiatrist tomorrow. one i haven't seen in six months. one who i cancelled appointments with many times. almost to the point of embarassment. perhaps i can forgive myself just this once and call it a night without feeling like i've lost my get up and go? or that i can't do anything unless the boy is tagging along? let's face it, that's what i'm really worried about.

i don't want to be whipped. so let's here it people! i'm staying home on a tuesday!