Dang

So have spent some time with eli. It was nice not playing cat and mouse. However, there is far too much evidence to my being a stand-in. His ex was a stand-in. Just someone to go places with, someone to smooch and someone to rub his back and tell him he looks great.

My response to this is the one I usually adopt... if he doesn't see how cool I am then better stay away from the bastard. When you get pretty attached to someone, staying the hell away becomes pretty hard to do. And always in the back of my mind, what if I'm not a stand-in? Could be that my depression has clouded perception... Doubt it though.

One day, I'm going to try and be adult about dating. I'm not going to date commitment-phobes or deadbeats. I'm not going to date anyone that can't face conflict without hiding their face. Yes, this is what I will do one day. All past relationships to the contrary, I still assume that this is a posibility.

Dang.